Jokes On Other Sites

I develop these jokes with my business partner.

This is where I’m going to put links to things that I’ve written for other sites, because sometimes the internet likes me. They’ll be funny, usually.

Cracked – One of the best humor sites in the world

5 Harsh Realities Of Life As A Video Game Tournament Winner

6 Myths About Body Builders That Are Total BS

5 Ways Hollywood Ruins Its Own Main Characters

6 Movie Special Effects That Have Gotten Worse Over Time

The 5 Unexpected Downsides Of Working At A Movie Theater

5 Famous Actors Who Play The Same Role In Every Commercial

HecklerSpray - Pop culture and Entertainment. Distaste and curiosity.

Leaked Email Regarding Michael Bay’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Film

Robot Combat League Is The Most Boring Show About Fighting Robots Ever

5 Amazing Stephen King Stories That Should Be Adapted For TV

5 Action Stars Who Made Confusing Attempts At Music

Pitbull VS Flo Rida: Who Sucks Less? 

The 5 Most Un-Listenable 2013 Grammy Nominees 

Downton Abbey Is A Show About Boring Discussions And Hating America

7 Reasons Why Fake TV Wrestling Is Better Than Taking Your Vitamins 

The 5 Dumbest Super Bowl Commercials

The 7 Most Awesome American Horror Story Characters

JJ Abrams To Direct A Star Wars Film (And Become A God)

4 Terrible Relationship Tips From How I Met Your Mother

Spring Breakers Is Going To Piss Off Old People

5 Reasons Why Justified Is The Best Show On TV

5 TV Fan Fiction Crossovers That Shouldn’t Exist

The 7 Worst YouTube Cover Songs Of All Time

Why Texas Chainsaw 3D Is Just Bizarre And Awful

5 Ridiculous Pieces Of Game Of Thrones Merchandise 

The 4 Worst Musical Artists Of 2012

The 5 Worst Actors Of 2012

Why Boardwalk Empire Isn’t More Popular

50 Shades Of Grey Is Going To Be A Bizarre Movie

Hitchcock Psycho Fans Are Going To Hate Bates Motel

Everyone Still Wants To Copy Quentin Tarantino

Black Actors Playing Comic Book Superheroes Expose Racism

Rihanna’s ‘Unapologetic’ Ruined By Her Messy Personal Life

Harrison Ford Is An Old Badass, Not A Badass Who Got Old

The Walking Dead Is Finally Becoming Good

The X-Men Franchise Is Beyond Saving

Wreck-It-Ralph Will Probably Be An Overrated Retro Video Game Movie

Why Arnold Schwarzeneggar Can Save Any Franchise

Ben Affleck Actually Starting To Suck Less Now

I’m Surprised Anyone Watched 666 Park Avenue

Warning: Bruno Mars Will Ruin Your Self Esteem

Taken 2 Is An Utterly Useless Movie

Doctor Who Fans Are Irritating People Who Need To Shut Up

Ke$ha Had Crazy Sex With A Ghost (And Lost Her Inspiration)

4 Internet Celebrities Who Are Completely Annoying

Glee Is A Show About Secret Agents And Sex Robots

Gerard Butler: Half Macho Man, Half Romantic Comedy

Tim Burton Doesn’t Know How To Stay Talented

Channing Tatum’s Movies Prove That He Hates Acting

The 4 Biggest WTF’s In Rob Zombie’s Work

Pitbull’s Lyrics Are Gibberish And He’s Cool With It

7 DVD Covers That Make The Movies Inside Look Stupid

The 4 Weirdest Breaking Bad Fan Fiction Ideas

Why Dwayne Johnson Is Too Awesome For Real Life

5 Great TV Shows That Actually Suck

The 5 Most Annoying Crippled Characters In Horror Movies

5 Movie Extras That Had No Idea What They Were Doing

I Totally Understand Why The Hobbit Needs To Be 3 Movies

The 10 Creepiest Things On The Internet That Involve Ryan Gosling

How Louie Makes Me Feel Both Ashamed And Happy

You’ll Look Dumb Buying These 7 Pop Albums

Dear, Rihanna. Your Heart Is An Idiot 

8 Things To Look For In The Post-Twilight World

7 MTV Shows That Hated Their Audience

Take Me Out Insults Everyone Involved In It

Unsurprisingly, Pitbull and Shakira Ruin A Song Together

If You Took The Expendables 2 Poster Literally

Forces Of Geek (Don’t Go In The Basement) – Bi-weekly column about my dealings with the horror genre. 

Daniel Dockery’s Crocodile

IMDb VS Crocodile

I Used To Like Jaws 2 More Than Jaws

Greatest Lines

3 Animal Attack Films That You Should See

The Franklin Scale

Thriller VS Horror (And Why It Really Doesn’t Matter)

I’d Never Seen Son Of Kong

Friday the 13th Minus Jason

Five Horror Sequels That Went Nuts

Three Horror Sub-Genres That Need To Be Brought Back

Seven Horror Movies To Put In Your “Criterion Collection”

I’m Pumped For Eli Roth’s The Green Inferno

Daniel Dockery’s Halloween 4, 5 and 9

My Ex-Girlfriend Vomited On Me During Audition

The Smoking Jacket – Jokes and Lists for the masses.                                                                                                                                                                                                                      10 Ridiculous Wrestling Gimmicks

Tailgate Party Ruiners

Steven Seagal Improves Movies

9 Sad Twitter Trends

Relationships: The MTV Friendzone Way

Turn Your Life Into An Adele Song   

The Teen Mom Guide To Parenting

Piranha 3DD Will Be The Greatest Film Ever

Yell! Magazine – Reviews, retrospectives and comedy dealing with stuff that stabs. 

TOM HARDY IS MAD MAX IS SPIKY CARS

PENNY DREADFUL IS MY FAVORITE ALAN MOORE STORY

MR. PICKLES

7 GODZILLA FIGHTS FOR THE NEW GENERATION

I DON’T WANT A CLERKS 3. ANTI-CLAUS, HOWEVER…

THE NEW GODZILLA TRAILER IS THE BEST THING THAT’S EVER HAPPENED

THE EVIL WITHIN

SALEM: A DECENT LOOKING SHOW WITH A TERRIBLY EDITED TRAILER. (NICE BEARDS, THOUGH)

THE CRITERION COLLECTION WILL MAKE HEAD EXPLODING INTO AN ART FORM (SCANNERS RELEASE)

GAMERA, FRIEND OF CHILDREN AND COOL DVD SETS

FINALLY, AN ACTUAL CANNIBAL MOVIE

ALL PEOPLE NEED PRO WRESTLER NICKNAMES, ESPECIALLY LEPRECHAUNS 

SLENDER IN SPACE (COPYRIGHT DOCKERY 2014)

2013 Halloween Movie Recommendations

Piranha VS Piranha 2 VS Piranha 3D VS Piranha 3DD

Godzilla Posters: 1954 VS 1998 VS 2014

My Lil Belial Custom Creature Pillow

Murder Weapon Series Part 1: Texas Chainsaw 3D

The Twelve Days Of Horror Christmas

Last Minute Halloween Party Checklist

2012 Halloween Movie Recommendations 

5 Must-Have Horror Films Banned In Germany

REC Retrospective

Child’s Play Retrospective

The Curse Of Frankenstein Review

A Nightmare On Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors Review

Top 10: Zombies With Killer Character

Intruders Review

Top 10: Gale Ann Hurd-Produced Movies

Yell! Magazines Top 20: Worst Horror Movies Ever

Dark Shadows Review

The Future of Horror on TV

The Slumber Party Massacre Retrospective

The Hills Have Eyes Review

The Tao Of Hatchet

House Of Comics

The Sad Executioner (sometimes I write for it)

Toonzone 

I Love Young Justice

Four Un-Adaptable DC Stories  

Hellboy: House Of The Dead Review

Insert Eyeroll

Steven Segal Claims “I’m Method Acting” For His Latest Role

Contracast (podcast that I join sometimes. Listen to my opinion and change yours)

Episode 37 (Cold Medicine)                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     Episode 38 (Life Events)                                                                                                                                                                                               Episode 39 (Serious Business)

The Forty Ounce (If you like music, you’ll like this. And if you don’t like music, you love me.)

Episode 1 : Katy Perry’s “The One That Got Away,” Jason Derulo’s “It Girl,” Adele’s “Set Fire To The Rain,” Bruno Mars “It Will Rain,” Pitbull’s “International Love,” and Big Sean’s “Ass”

Episode 2: Toby Keith sucks and David Guetta rules.

Episode 3: We talk about the Grammys and make ill-informed decisions.

Episode 4: Welcome to Planet Pit!

Episode 5: We’re takin’ you straight to awkward town.

Episode 6: All hate, all the time! And dating advice!

Episode 7: Pitbull? Dating advice? Sign you up!

Episode 8: It sounded better in my head.

Episode 9: Viva La Rebelution!

Episode 10: I Found It Interesting

Episode 11: Flex Into The Mic

Episode 12: We Are Telepathic Now

The Prancing Laggard Pub – Video Games!

The Dead Space Travel Guide: Ishimura Ahoy!

Six Reasons Why Mortal Kombat Is Better Than My Friends

Development Meeting: Street Fighter Ultimax

StiffMAG – Horror/Subculture magazine. (In various issues)

 

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