10 Things That You Should Never Say To Someone Who Can’t Grow A Full Beard

beard

Not being able to grow a full beard is a tough problem that many people face. Here are a few statements that you should probably avoid when you meet a person that only has part of a beard.

“Are you stuck between ages, babyman?”

“If I was to get lost in your beard, I could probably find my way out.”

“Do you buy your razors at the broken razors store?”

“Is your chin sad?”

“I bet that you pay eight bucks at a ten buck barbershop, and that you constantly compare yourself to your dad.”

“Hey! When you shave, you’re supposed to get all of your face, and not just pluck hairs individually with some tweezers! You’re not good at anything. I’m your dad.”

“Do you only get half itch, but wish that you got full itch?”

“If I feel it, will I lose some of my beard too? How did this happen to you? What god would do this to a person? My god wouldn’t.”

“I can make you grow a beard, whether you want to or not.”

“Leave beard college. You’ve failed all of your beard classes. You can’t retake the exam.”

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2 responses to “10 Things That You Should Never Say To Someone Who Can’t Grow A Full Beard

  1. never been to your blog before but like your writing on cracked. Just read your anime article and wanted to agree with your observations. I just started watching one piece a few months ago and have been binging it to the point I am around the 620 mark (just after the punk hazard arc) it was difficult being on the first 50 episodes and knowing how much I had to go but definitely worth it. I don’t have a Twitter even as a 24 year old “kid” but I think I might just to follow you. Hope to talk anime with you in the future!

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